With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility...

This post will be a short one. I desire only to bring forward a serious problem that I have recently been made aware of.

My husband has an iPad. He loves it. He takes it with him everywhere he goes--even to bed. I don't blame him, it IS an extremely cool piece of technology. However, with the awesome power provided to him by the iPad, I believe my dear husband has begun to grow a bit power mad.

Just the other day...our daughter was taking a nap, my son and I were watching a TV show that had been recorded on our DVR, and my husband--being the great, generous and non-squeamish person that he is--was at a local church donating blood. (Side note: I can't bring myself to donate blood. I know it's important--I've needed two transfusions in my time--but I JUST GET TOO FREAKED OUT BY NEEDLES!!!)

Anyhoo, as I mentioned before, my son and I were happily enjoying a DVR recording of one of his favorite shows. And then...well, let me see if I can illustrate the situation to you with an e-mail conversation between myself and my dear husband...

Me: "I WILL END YOU!!!"

Him: "What?"

Me: "Well...we were watching a recording of Phineas and Ferb, when we suddenly found ourselves watching a tennis match. You wouldn't know anything about that, WOULD YOU?!?"

Him: "Not a thing! (with an innocent look on my face)"

That's right! My husband's iPad, via the internet, has the power to mess with our cable from a distance. He could be in freaking Chicago and still make me watch Telemundo if he wanted to!

Now tell me dear readers: Does that seem fair to you? I personally believe that no one should be given that kind of power. It's bound to make megalomaniacs out of the entire world population! Curse you, Apple!!!

Best. Store. Ever.

Last week, our little family went out to run some errands. One of our stops on this shopping trip was to a local Walgreen's. Walking through the store, I noticed that many of the shelves were empty. I figured that the employees must have gotten in a new shipment of supplies or something and had not as yet restocked the shelves. And then I started walking up and down the aisles, and I discovered that this particular Walgreen's must be run by some mad geniuses!

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Picture this: You're running late for Bingo night. On top of that, you're wearing the last of your "bladder control supplies", you're out of contact lens solution, AND your ears have been HORRIBLY full of ear wax and you've been looking for SOMETHING to help fix it. Not to mention the fact that you missed your granddaughter (or niece or cousin) 's birthday, and have yet to buy her a gift. You think you only have time to fix one of these problems and pull into your local Walgreen's while you attempt to prioritize your shopping list.

Inside the store, you turn a corner, and find yourself on a truly magical aisle. This one, single aisle has EVERYTHING you need! That's right: Bladder control supplies, contact lens solution, ear wax flusher stuff, AND toys for any little girl you may need to buy a gift for! It's a Walgreen's miracle!

You think THAT was amazing, now imagine this: You're an aspiring mugger. You're running late for your "Mugging, 101" class, and YOUR FORGOT YOUR MUGGER WEAPON!!! As you curse your forgetfulness, your mother calls and asks you to pick up a corkscrew and some coffee filters. Then you get a text from your girlfriend (or boyfriend, wife, husband, etc.): "hey babe! could u pick up some coat hangers, a travel pillow, a tote bag and an umbrella for me? thanx! luv u!" THEN you remember that you need some Pup-Peroni, a chew toy and a doggie bed for Fido. And then you remember that you're also out of packing tape for your day job as a boxer for Wal-Mart. "How will I EVER get everything I need?" Then, salvation arrives.

You pull into the local Walgreen's and run inside, trying to remember your shopping list, and prioritizing every item so you know which ones you need to get NOW and which ones can wait until after "Mugging, 101" is over. Inside the store, you turn that magical corner and BLAM!!! There it is! That's right, you've found the very rare "Knife/Coffee Filter/Corkscrew/Coat Hanger/Travel Pillow/ Tote Bag/Umbrella/Dog Food and Doggy Bed/Tape and Craft Supplies Aisle!!! Yet ANOTHER Walgreen's miracle has come to pass!

I really hope that more stores will follow the model that the mad geniuses at this particular Walgreen's have created. Sure, it seems crazy at first but when you think about the possibilities...it's freaking BRILLIANT!!! I know I'll be going back, and I really hope these people won't cave to society's "norms". They should keep their store just as it was when I went there last week. This scheme is just too perfect to not catch on! Watch out Wal-Mart and Target! Your reign of terror is very nearly over!

An Apology...

I finished my last post after spending a great deal of time and effort on it. Then I was unceremoniously slapped across the face by the jerk-wads that run Blogger. "Why?" you may wonder, "Why is Candice cursing the beautiful godlike figures that make this blogosphere possible?"

I'll tell you why!!!

No matter how I tried to space my post so that it looked beautiful and perfect according to my own specifications, and no matter how many times or different ways I tried to fix it, Blogger decided to mush all of my pictures into a jumbled mess and squished the majority of the text into one massive paragraph!!! Not even I would read such a lousy-looking post, and I'm the one that wrote it!!!

So there you are, Blogger. I'm giving you an official "YOU SUCK" and a kick directly to your groin. May you be hunched over in pain for at least a week. Fix your freaking formatter or die!!!

To anyone that may have attempted in vain to enjoy my last post, I offer my deepest apologies. Hopefully this was a one time thing and the powers that be in the Blogger universe and I can patch things up and be friends again.

Until next time,
A VERY Disgruntled Blogger

The Mystery...Revealed!!!

Due to overwhelming curiosity from Mynx and Chanel, I have decided that the time has finally come to reveal the identity of the beautiful gift that my dear husband bought for me.

What could it be? Well...let's see if you can guess...

That's right, I finally got the nook from Barnes and Noble! It's totally amazing! Yes, I agonized for MONTHS over whether I should get the well-loved Kindle from Amazon, or the nook. I had tried the nook and liked it, but I couldn't find anyone close by who onwed and Kindle that I could try before making my decision.

Then, one night at Best Buy, I found that they had an entire eReader display, complete with Kindle and nook side by side. Having done a LOT of research, and knowing full well that both devices are extremely similar in reference to quality, I tried them both. The Kindle is really nice, but the nook just seemed to fit me better. In the end, the choice between the nook and the Kindle comes down to personal preference, and I prefer the former.

Well, I put the device on my Christmas list, and got over $100 in gift cards from loving family members. Then, on New Year's Day, my husband came home and said: "I called your family, and they've agreed to babysit tonight while we go out to dinner and a movie. Plan on a night out."

Needless to say I needed no second invitation. Before I knew it, the kids were all ready to go to their Grandma's house, and Tyler and I were on our way to a rare and valuable date night. As we drove toward the restaurant, Tyler said: "We can look at the nook too while we're out, so you can decide if you want it or not." (I'd been having second thoughts about the device, worried that it was the end of paper books as I'd always known and loved them. The idea upset me. Don't laugh!)

We pulled up to the restaurant, put our name on the list, and were told that it would be a 45 minute wait. I told Tyler and he said: "That's perfect. We'll run over to Barnes and Noble, you can look at the nook and make a final decision about it over dinner." We went, and I looked at the device. It really is amazing. I even looked at the new nook Color (it's basically a VERY simplified iPad. You know: e-mail, internet, it even reads to your kids for you--no joke!)

We went to dinner, got right in, and I mulled over my decision while we ate. Afterwards, we had about an hour to kill before the movie, and we went back to the bookstore for me to make my final verdict.

It took a lot of thought, but in the end, I knew I wanted it. So I brought Tyler my final decision. He smiled, said: "Good, I'm glad you finally decided to do something nice for yourself," and then surprised me by paying for the whole thing himself, encouraging me to use my gift cards to stock up on e-books.

You know what? I haven't regretted buying my nook for a second. As you can probably see from the pictures, I decided not to get the nook Color. (Although I still have the option to take mine back and get the upgrade for the next 3 days--if I should decide to do so)

And...just because I can...here's some more pictures:

This is a picture of my chosen wallpaper...a tulip!

Look! It's Edgar Allen Poe and his Raven!

(When my nook goes to sleep, the screensaver is a different author every time...)

Well, there you have it. I hope you're not disappointed. My only problem right now is coming up with a name for my nook. Any suggestions?

Geez, It's Been A While. Remember Me?...

Okay, I'll admit it. I've been pretty lazy with the posts over the last month. Don't judge me! I was enjoying some time off with the family and revelling in the holidays for a while. It was fabulous.---

So...back to business.

Does anyone remember this post about my extraordinary skills for personal injury? Well, I've just added another notch to that belt.

Two days ago, I was enjoying a movie with my son while my daughter took her afternoon nap. ("How to Train Your Dragon"--One of the best movies EVER!!!) I went upstairs to do something (I honestly don't remember what it was), and as I was coming down the stairs again, my right foot decided to utterly betray me, twisting itself into a most unnatural position. Naturally, I fell to the floor with a scream, gasping and sobbing like the mature adult that I am.

Then my hero came to save me.

That's right, my amazing five-year-old son immediately ran up the stairs to where I was still whimpering in pain and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. He held me until I stopped crying. Then he watched me carefully and followed protectively as I managed to stand up again and hobble to a place where I could put my injured foot up.

**Just so you won't spend your weekend sick with worry: My foot is fine. I can walk on it with minimal pain now. Phew! I know, you're SOOO relieved!**

In other news, school has started back up again. That's right, Spring Semester 2011 has commenced and is now in full swing. In case anyone is even remotely interested, my schedule is as follows: Tuesday nights: Biological Psychology. Thursday nights: Introduction to Public Speaking. Online: Abnormal Psychology and Introduction to Mass Communication. It appears that all of these classes are going to require that I do a lot of reading. Ha! Bring it on!

So...I think that's it for now. My next post will probably be a short rant about how much I love the fabulous gift that my dear husband bought for me last week....I know, the suspense is killing you, right?